I remember when i was pvping with someone, He told me that 'I bet u cant beat me in a PVP battle' and i said Ok,but what will u give me as a reward for beating u and he said i will give u all my diamonds and i accepted so we pvped and little did he knew i can fly on that server so he cant kill me and therefore i killed him and he raged quit.

RoyalPrinceRaul, it's for CR.

While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?"
One more

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" Little Johnny said, "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself"

I got 2
Dad: Say daddy!
Baby: Mommy!
Dad: Come on, say daddy!
Baby: Mommy!
Dad: F*ck you, say daddy!
Baby: F*ck you, Mommy!
Mom: Honey, I'm home!
Baby: F*ck you!
Mom: Who taught you that?
Baby: Daddy!
Dad: Son of a b*tch.



Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No... i just feel bad that you're standing alone..."

What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant?
Swimming Trunks!
Why do elf's go to school?
To learn the elf - abet!
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little bogie in it!
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel!
Why cant you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she will let it go!
What was the Tomato doing whilst the lettuce was ahead?
Trying to "ketchup"
Thanks for reading

removed

Me: Hey mate, who did you dance with?
Friend: Oh, she's called Paula.
Me: Dude, that's Robert in disguise.
Friend: Let's see then.

~~two minutes later~~
Friend: NOT HER! NOT HER! SHE PEES STANDING UP!
Me: I told you.

A noob joined minecraft one day
Noob: I found 2 kind of trees
1st kind of tree : a oak wood but inside a beautiful red water place
2nd kind of tree: a birch wood but it is on the land
Noob: OFC the 1st kind of tree is always the best ;D
Noob jump down and...............................
Noob:wtf!?!?!?!?A tree is killing me wth!?!?!?!tree is a hacker!!!!
Noob has been killed by lava
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Noob has left the game